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2004-03-22 - 5:58 p.m. axi wrote, "silence kills. keep talking." and it means a lot. i am tired and blank right now, i just had a week off of school that didn't really accomplish much in my head or life. i dyed my hair black and revised some poems. i remembered the layers of bad silence that are so easy to forget. with almost everyone i used to be close with on long island, there is so much that i want to say but each relationship has its own taboo. my dad's house has silence so thick it fogs up the glass and all the food has meat or MSG in it. blech. opening the vegetable drawer reveals that it's full of booze, nothing healthy in here, no siree. after a week of eating preservatives my body gave up and i lay around in intense pain all day. so it goes, huh? i am exhausted and i can't really think of anything to fill my day. perhaps a jaunt to the library for some light reading is in order. the only fun magazine my school library has is "the advocate", but that's fine. that's fluffy enough for me right now. my mother says i'm too bitter for a twenty year old and i told her i'm twenty-one and that there was a lot she didn't know about. we were quiet, in her kitchen. both thinking about it.
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