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2003-09-01 - 2:59 p.m. i'm at college and it is so fucking weird. i've been writing this entry in my head since i got here but i have forgotten the whole thing now. today my roomate (both of my roomates are nice thus far) was in the bathroom & this girl who i've NEVER talked to before went up with her & said, "so, you're roomates with ocean, huh?" she said yeah, and said girl was like, "ocean's gay, right?" and my roomate was like, "uh, how'd you know?" and girl was like, "she LOOKS gay." [uncomfy silence] "so, if you had to stereotype ocean, what word would you use?" my roomate was like, "uh, i think she's trying to go vegan..." girl gave her a look and walked away. so weird!!! i met this boy named zachariah who amazes me. we were talking about revolution and he told me how he was sent to a behavior modification camp as a teen where they made him dig his own grave and lie in it (and fuck you if you believe that these things don't happen) as a punishment once; and he came out of that hole a raving madman, realizing that he was willing to die for his beliefs. he is amazing, but like a hole i could fall into. he could be joe hill, or he could be charles manson. also, i've realized that when i was 18, i got a total hard-on about self-centered, spiky-haired, skinny boys. i am surrounded by them now and i couldn't give less of a shit. is that maturity? i don't know. i am remembering that i am lucky to be here, taking the longcuts and passing the open windows
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